Warrior Queen - 1987 (Tubi)

 

When the best thing about your movie is the poster art...

Cringe, cringe, cringe, super cringe... What did I watch??? I think someone forgot to complete the script. There is very little dialog, no character depth, and the plot is missing. The Warrior Queen doesn't speak until 30 minutes in, has maybe 3 lines of dialog the whole movie, and just shows up as a deus ex machina character. I don't know what her motivations are, nor any of the other cast for that matter.

The early scenes seem to be set up just for lots of T 'n A. Selling the slaves in the Pompeii market and then displaying them at a feast. Then you get some nonsensical gladiator games in the arena that are lame but drag on and on. This movie is only an hour ten minutes but it is so monotonous. 

Oh Loomis... 

Donald Pleasence (Dr. Loomis in Halloween) is in this and his character is annoying. Halloween was released in 1978 and Halloween II was released in 1981. This move was released in 1987. Was he offered no real acting gigs after Halloween? He was a good actor but in this... (shivers)... 

The heroes win... yay... I guess???

The last 10 minutes are people running around after the volcano blows up. Scenes from something else are spliced in. All of the effects are practical but very bad. The fighting choreography is even more cringe. This is just not a good move or even a okay movie on any level. Pass it up. Don't bother. Keep on moving!!!  


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